We all are humans, who sometimes make mistakes. However, to a mind of a child, its parents are more than just a human. The parents are its guardians, caretakers, and creators. And that is why they have a crucial part of the personality of the children. If they are hungry they speak to the parents and if they are cold and harsh they yell and shout when there is something wrong. The way people approach the mistakes is how they learn and overcome those mistakes.
Here are some phrases that you shouldn’t use when you talk to your child:
You’re worthless
This might be the worst thing that a child can hear, particularly when you are its mental figure and they expect most of to be approved. In this way, you are putting the child on a journey that never ends to search for approval from the outside world. You’re allowing them to think that they have nothing rather of helping them. So, instead of saying this, you can say something like ‘It is not your day, but you will do better the next time’, or ‘nobody is perfect’, or ‘you can do better’.
Stop crying right now
When a child does something for which it knows that it will be punished, it starts crying. That is its emotion even there is no reason to cry. It has the right to express how it feels. By stopping this process, the child will suppress its emotions. You should hug it and explain that it is wrong what it did but it is great to show how it feels.
I’m disappointed in you
This is normally said when the child already feels bad. We can be disappointed in everything in this world, although never in our own child since we are here to help them get on the right track. We need to lead them back when they do something wrong and show them and explain what was done wrong and why.
You’re not (something) enough
By saying this, you give the children a restricted image of themselves, indicating that they lack in something in order for them to be who they want to be or do what they want to do. They are enough to be themselves and they need to grow to become what they are. You should tell them to practice or train something before so they will grow that way.
Big girls/boys do not get scared
With this, you are forcing them to refuse how they really feel. The fear isn’t a terrible thing however it reminds them to be more careful. Tell them not to run away from the fear but to face it instead and learn from it. Tell them that it is normal to be scared since all of us get scared sometimes. Encourage them that they will do the right thing even when they are scared because they are your heroes.
Source: vibespirit.com
